Chapter 43- Lightning

A friend once told me:

"Love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. I say fall head over heels, find someone you can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. How do you find him? Well, you forget your head and you listen to your heart because the truth is there is no sense living your life without it. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love- well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived. Stay open, who knows? Lightning could strike."

Chapter 42- Weddins and outs

Do you ever get on Facebook... or Pinterest... or maybe you actually have friends and go to receptions... anyway, do you ever see a wedding and you can't help but thank the heavens that it isn't yours?

You think, "Oh dear, another wedding with yellow and grey as the colors?"or "Isn't her dress just.... straight out of a horror movie!" Okay okay, I exaggerate.

But haven't you seen that bride that chooses colors that only are found on the Disney Princess color wheel at Home Depot?
Or the one that makes her bridesmaids wear awful, unflattering dresses?

Don't get me started on the cakes. I'm sorry, but a Groom's cake with a tool box on it made out of fondant isn't classy and it's not cute.

All of the cookie cutter dresses with the sash and the ruching (is that even how you spell it?) are so ordinary. They are lovely, but where's the individuality these days? Sigh... Karma is going to get me back big time for this!

Chapter 41- CHRISTmas

I BELIEVE

Chapter 40- You're a three decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce

I

miss

all the

Christmas

spirit from

my childhood;

that comforting

feeling of magic in

the air. You felt it in

your bones. There was

the giddy excitement from

not knowing what you might

get. Everyone glowed, because

back then everyone remembered

the real reason behind the holidays.

Now, I don't understand Christmas. It

isn't the same Christmas as when I was

little and there was something truly sacred

about this season. Now, frustration fills the air

as people bustle about looking for the perfect gift

that they know they don't have the money for, and

then they settle for something that's not needed. Now

Christmas morning comes, the presents are opened and

then what? There are no surprises.. You plaster on a smile

so your family will think you really do "love it!" but then the

rest of the day is spent making piles of what needs to be taken

back and then finding the correct receipts. Now, Christmas lasts

an hour, maybe two, and then the rest of the day is just ordinary.

Christmas shouldn't be ordinary. Christmas should be extraordinary.

Christmas shouldn't be about generic electronics and another ill fitting

sweater. Christmas should be about playing another round of Phase Ten

and passing around the half-eaten box of chocolates. Christmas should be

white. Christmas is supposed be enchanted. It should be special, but it isn't.

Now, Christmas is a disappointment. My heart breaks because something has

changed. I suppose I might be the one who's changed. Perhaps I expect too much.

Perhaps, I have gotten lost along the way to adulthood. I just know that Christmas

isn't about presents. It isn't about how much money is spent or remembering to pick

up the honey baked ham. Christmas is about spending time as a family. After all, they

are the whole reason we're here. Families are why He was born; the reason he lived and

died. Without Him we are fallen, and without families we are lost. So, maybe my soul is an

appalling dump heap overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish

imaginable,

mangled up

in tangled up

knots, but...

Chapter 39- Today

Today I made an idiot out of myself.

I know it's hard to imagine little old me could muster such a thing, but lo and behold, no one is immune.

Here's the story:

Today I came out of class to see a blanket of snow covering the sidewalk. Needless to say, I was ecstatic. Sometimes a girl's gotta sing It's Beginning to Look a lot Like Christmas at the top of her lungs while pretending to ice skate. That's normal right? Oh wait, it's not, and to top it off I heard someone say in awe, "Cami, what are you doing?" It was not a good friend, but he was good looking. Fantastic. What could I do, I was taken so off guard? So, I said, "Well, right now I'm ice skating." Cue cheesy smile. He laughed. I turned as red as my homemade Christmas sweater. What a great way to start the day.

Chapter 38- Peace, Love, and Trees

Outside; that’s where I want to be. I just want to go camping and hiking and biking and horseback riding. I want to wear ugly old boots and a sweat stained baseball cap with a pair of khaki shorts and an ill-fitting T shirt. I want to be a part of nature. I don’t want to have to shower or wear makeup, but instead I want to sleep under the stars and wander in the wild, using a waterfall to wash my hair and wildflowers to make a crown. My blanket will be the stars and my bed a field of bluebells. I want to really feel the sun and taste the breeze. In the morning, I want the sound of the birds to awaken me and at night I want to be serenaded by an orchestra of crickets and coyotes. I dream of living off of granola bars, dried apples and jerky as I traipse through valleys and rediscover forgotten mountain trails. I just want to experience the beauty that surrounds me. Each day would be an adventure waiting to happen. There would be no rules; no boundaries, just open air and freedom. I would witness life. The simple things in life would become the important things, just like it they are supposed to be. I want to smell like a campfire and pine needles.

I want to be an outsider.

Chapter 37- You will laugh

http://sendables.jibjab.com/view/S3QUR6L0e2rMFc9MDaCc